Steam Bucket

We just got back from our second most excellent Mexican road trip, this time a camping trip- my first camping in Mexico- to Tolantongo, a gorgeous canyon filled with hot springs. Things got hot right away at the start of our trip. We were meeting friends a little ways away from home, working our way through Friday afternoon traffic in the city.

The trip would be about fifteen minutes by foot, but alas, Friday afternoon traffic in Mexico City is like an angry beast. An angry beast with a mean streak, rabies, and a loaded semi-automatic gun.

We're dropping off my mother-in-law before meeting up with our friends for the drive out, and I get in line to make a left turn in one of the few intersections of the city that a) has a left hand turn lane, and b) has a left hand turn arrow. I'm waiting behind about three thousand cars, and Iti tells me "waiting is bunk, go around and take a left from the next lane over". OK, so I follow orders like a good soldier, pull around, and get to the intersection after the left turn arrow goes red (like I thought would happen). I pull out into the intersection to the right of the first car waiting to turn left, and Iti freaks out; "OH MY GOD! DON'T DO THAT!"

Huh?

I remember calmly replying "Honey, I'm doing exactly what you told me to do. What is your concern?" She remembers it more like me screaming "WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT DO YOU FREAKING WANT ME TO DO?"

Apparently we're both severely allergic to Friday afternoon traffic in the city. Also apparently, I wasn't the worst offender, as a pickup truck pulls up to my right, so we have three cars stacked in the intersection waiting to turn. Gotta love the driving here!

Without further bloodshed we make it to our friend Moy's office, wait for his wife and kids to get there and him to finish up work, and hit the road. It took us about an hour and forty minutes to take the normally half-hour drive to the city limits, this after Moy's poor wife Karen spent like two hours driving over to his office (it's NOT that far). Wow, that really sucked.

We hit the road, thinking we'd stop and eat lunch sometime after getting out of the city. We didn't take off from the office until about 3, and Iti was starving by about 3:30. Fortunately the traffic was so bad we could pull off some emergency munchie passing between the two cars. Moy and Karen were traveling with two small kids, so they had a small convenience store's worth of snacks in the car: chocolate milk, chips, Rice Crispy bars, you know the drill.

After a couple hours, people wanted to keep going and try to get to our destination before dark. This didn't quite work out. By nightfall we were still at least 30-45 minutes away from our eventual campsite. We hit this long stretch of road after the last town before Tolantongo, that had about three thousand small convenience stores, one after another, each with its own unmarked and unpainted speed bump that was impossible to see in the dusk. But oh, we felt them, each and every one. I'll really enjoy having to put a new suspension on a two-month-old car. We made a quick potty break for the kids (and Iti) at one of the first stores.

To get to Tolantongo at the bottom of the canyon, you have to drive about 15 minutes on a dirt road with switch-backs worthy of the drive to the Mount Bierstadt trail head in Colorado. In hind sight it may have been best that we did this drive in the dark; we couldn't see how close we were to flying off the mountain to our deaths in the middle of nowhere.

We get to the one permanent restaurant just above our eventual campsite at about 8:40pm. Tired, hungry, and a little cranky from the long car ride, we go up to the restaurant, knock on the door, and ask for a table. The response: "Sorry, we've been closed since 9". Uh, A. it's not 9pm yet, and B. there was a HUGE sign on the side of the building stating they were open until 10pm. Come ON, people. After much arguing and cajoling, they agreed to let us in and give us a limited menu of quesadillas, sopes, and enchiladas. Lazy bastards. It was still delicious, and surprisingly cheap.

Just down from the restaurant, we parked, and the attendant tells us we can either head up-river to the main part of the park to set up camp, or we can head down-river. Iti made the executive decision to go down-river, which turned out to be the best possible move. We find a great spot with plenty of shade for the day time, reasonably isolated from other tents. When Moy and I went up-river to the main part of the park to buy firewood, we saw about a million tents set up side by side. It was like a KOA campground, but more packed, without little roads or lanes splitting the rows of campsites. Yowza!

Moy and Karen's youngest Ariela had a nasty infection and was on antibiotics. The poor kid ran a fever, and threw up a few times during the night, giving her parents little rest. In spite of that, they toughed it out for the weekend, and I think they were glad they stayed. She really perked up during the day and after being forced to take her medicine, and we all had an amazing time. Saturday morning Iti and I went swimming along the river with the other daughter, Liat, while mom and dad forced some medicine and a nap on the youngest. After their batteries were recharged, we all met up and went to the Grotto. You have to see this place to believe it! It is this shallow cave that's probably about the size of one and a half tennis courts, with ceilings as high as 12 feet, and hot water springs gushing out of the ceiling at various spots. It was really incredible. One spring was pushing out such a high volume of water you felt like you were getting sprayed with hot water out of a fire hose when you stood under it. If you felt like taking an excellent chance of killing yourself, there were two main attractions. First, they hung a rope off a slick rock face for the bold to climb. It was like trying to climb up a wet eel; the rock and rope were both extremely slimy and slippery, and the rock was there to smack up against when you slipped. Even more dangerous was this side tunnel: it went back probably 30 feet or more, with springs at the back of this cavern. The current was so strong, you couldn't possibly make it up the cavern without having your legs taken out from under you by the strong currents in the knee-to-waist deep water. They slung a couple of (equally slimy) ropes along the side so you could pull yourself against the current. I don't know what was riskier: going in or coming back out. I nearly died both ways. You can tell the underlying sentiment throughout Mexico is "If you want to kill yourself, go right ahead. We don't give a f#@!"

Amen.

Above the Grotto was the Tunnel, another cave, much narrower, with hot spring water coming down literally from all over the ceiling. For the adventurous, you can go to the back, climb up a ledge about as high as my head, then crawl through this small hole on all fours to get to this pool big enough for about three people (zero people if anyone has the slightest claustrophobia). There was absolutely NO light making it back there from the entrance. They had one dude paid to sit in there with a water-proof flashlight, to take tourists back and hopefully keep anyone from dying. The poor guy had to sit in this sauna for 10 hours a day, with only a 30 minute break from the water, heat, steam, and close spaces. I think this is the one place on earth that truly needs a labor union! But he seemed happy enough.

After the tunnel we decided to take a break for "lunch", lunch being the Mexican definition which means it occurs sometime between 3pm and 6pm. On the way to "lunch" we're walking along the more developed part of Tolantongo: basically a lot of stucco buildings with little shops, bathrooms, some man-made swimming pools, etc. We're walking down this narrow dirt lane with shops on one side and a drop-off to a lower level on the other, and some freak decided to pitch his tent up against the wall between two shops. It was one of the most red-neck things this Gringo has ever seen! You have to check out Iti's photos on her blog; I just can't do it justice. What a knuckle-head.

We went to lunch at the same restaurant that tried to deny us the night before, mostly because it was the only real restaurant in the place. It was nice- definitely a step up with the full menu. I had cecina for the first time (a nice cut of salted beef). After we finished lunch we went over to the other side of the park, which was possibly more beautiful than the first. There is this huge section where hot spring water was running down the rock face along the canyon. They augmented the natural rock with cement to form about 40 different little pools, with stone stairs connecting them. The water was coming out towards the top and cascading down the mountain, hitting each pool on its way down. The pools closer to the top were warmer,
since they were closer to the source of the spring, while things got cooler as you moved down. There are gorgeous views across the canyon, and you're surrounded by little cascades and waterfalls. Truly a magnificent place.

For dinner that night rather than going to the fancy "restaurant" (where the six of us could dine nicely for about $50 US), we decided to hit up one of the ladies who ran a little grill along the river. The girls were so wiped we couldn't get them up for dinner, nor even campfires with marshmallows! So we had a nice adult-only evening. We got a homemade FEAST for about ten bucks US, then had a nice evening of beers (everyone but Iti), marshmallows (all), campfires, and star-gazing. What a trip! Sunday we had more fun in the pools before the drive back to Mexico City.

We had a little excitement on the way back. We just got back into the city and we're stopped at a red light, and a sweet black BMW M6 (the expensive one) rolls up on the left. I see that car and say "Now THAT'S a freaking car!" Nice ride. The guy instantly shows his jerk reflexes, totally swerving around the car stopped in front of us, blowing through the red, gunning it and having to swerve around the cross traffic that has a green. Iti calls him some really bad names, and I say "Yeah, with a car like that he's probably a drug dealer". No sooner than I say that, two police cars come up in hot pursuit, one following him and the other going the wrong way down a five lane one way street to try and cut him off. "Wow, I guess he really was a drug dealer". We roll along another block, and as Iti is saying "hmm, a silent chase, they weren't using their sirens", then ANOTHER cop comes up with sirens screaming, hauling ass after the posse. Iti's reaction" I"M glad we didn't get caught up in that mess". True dat.

I certainly hope that's my closest encounter with a drug dealer, or whatever kind of criminal he was. This Gringo wouldn't mind a ride in that sweet Bimmer though...

A Chicago Gringo in Mexico