Civic Responsibility Strikes Again

I was totally appalled last night. So, today is the Mexican Independence Day, which is an even bigger holiday here than July 4 in the US. People take this date really seriously, in the partying sense. We went to dinner last night, and as we were leaving the restaurant at 9 there was a line wrapped around the block of people waiting to get in and enjoy the festivities. Every restaurant, bar, and club in the city seemed to have a special party planned, with employees in costume, party favors, the whole works.

Well, great, all well and good. People want to party and have a good time, they should. As you can imagine, this is a pretty big drinking holiday. Now here is where the real genius comes in. The city police decided that this would be a "free" night: i.e. they would NOT put up road blocks and randomly test people for drunken driving. It's like they're saying "Look, driving drunk is wrong, but we know on this night people REALLY want to drink and drive, so we won't try too hard to discourage it, just this once".

I mean, come ON, does ANYONE think this is a good idea? Besides all you alcoholics out there. The police clarified that if you got in an accident or something and it turns out you were drinking you'd still get in trouble, but PLEASE! Why would you relax your drunk driving prevention on the ONE FREAKING NIGHT that it's going to be the biggest problem ever? Can someone please explain the logic to me, because I sure don't get it!

I'm sure my mother would be completely horrified reading this blog. Fortunately, she doesn't know how to work her cellphone, much less a computer... I just hope my sisters and brother have the good sense not to share if they happen to read this. (I know I know: I'm screwed if I rely on others to have good sense...)

That stupid FREAKIN' cable company...

Oh yeah, I totally forgot, but I need to get this off my chest. I don't want to sound totally negative about this experience so far, but I'm completely pissed and need to rant. So two weeks ago was the opening weekend of the NFL 2008 season. And my beloved Bears were playing on Sunday Night Football. AND we got the right cable channel! I could watch my Bears their first week in action, even though I moved to Mexico!

WRONG!!!

Hella-wrong. They postponed the game to show the end of a stupid freakin' soccer game that went into overtime (it ended 1-0; I wanted to cry), and then the bastards showed TENNIS!!! The cable guide even ADVERTISED American Football NFL, Colts vs. Bears! SUCK! Of course I can't watch the game, and of course I was too miserable with my bronchitis to even suggest going somewhere to try and watch the game, and so of course I missed a great Bears win over the Colts, plus a studly debut by our rookie running back. To add insult to injury, the Bears weren't on TV yesterday, but they lost to a crappy Carolina team, a game I could have gone to and been miserable at in person if we hadn't picked the ONE year the Bears were traveling to North Carolina to move out of the country. My wife owes me a Bears game. Preferably a win.

On a positive note: my in-laws get, would you believe it, the NFL Network!!! Sweet baby hallelujiah, now we're talkin'. I can watch replays from all the Sunday games like 24-7. It has got to be the worst excuse for a cable channel ever, but I totally LOVE IT!

Alright, gotta go. Until next time,

A Chicago Gringo in Mexico

Am I really a blogger? REALLY?!?

Well, here we are: just moved to Mexico City, largest city in the world. We'll be here for two years; so I've got two weeks down, 102 weeks to go :) Iti kept telling me "you should write a blog" so what the heck, let's see how long my attention span will keep up with this one.

Let's see, some general impressions from the city: the chaos is absolutely thrilling. And I'm not kidding one bit. Driving in Mexico is an exercise in aggression. Whoever doesn't give a !#@$ the most (least?) wins. Some maneuvers you'll see regularly in the city: turning right from the left-most lane, preferably turning right in front of one or more cars going straight as fast as they can. Always exhilarating to witness, even more fun if you're in one of the cars involved in the imminent collision. It's amazing that I've witnessed zero car accidents to date, since in two weeks I've seen 314,877 near misses (being somehow involved as driver/passenger/pedestrian for 314,876 of them). I would have seen more near accidents, but I've learned the most enjoyable way to ride in a car is with your eyes closed.

Or completely drunk out of your mind.

The enterprising nature of the chilango (slang for a Mexico City native/dweller) never ceases to amaze. Just down the street from Iti's parents' apartment is a car wash. And I don't mean "an actual building or traditional place of business where someone has made an investment in real estate and equipment to wash automobiles in return for payment". I mean during the day there are a bunch of dudes hanging out on a normal street block, and they'll wash your car on the side of the street.

It's amazing the semi-permanence of these totally illegal operations (well, illegal a). in the US or b) in Mexico if anyone gave a crap). Along the block, on both sides, they have like a hundred old 50 gallon metal drums, filled with water (probably rain water), and some type of soap-like substance in a few. A bunch of dudes run around in coveralls and big rubber boots, and you can parallel park your car and get it "washed" for a few cents. I say "washed" because, really, how clean will your car be after being washed with rainwater from a rusty old oil drum? Exactly.

For convenience, there's also a mechanic next door: just down from the car wash two dudes hang out with a small tool box and fix cars on the side of the road. They usually have 2-3 cars they're working on, and seem to spend most of their time trying not to get hit by moving vehicles as they're laying under the cars they're fixing... all on the side of the road. It's totally amazing, you have to see this for yourself sometime.

Another great example is parking. People hang out in the street and decide they own certain city blocks. The parking is totally free from the city, but these enterprising souls decided that you should give them money for the privilege of parking for free. You pull up, they "help" you to park (waving their arms and screaming in an unnecessary fashion), and then "watch" your car for you while you're gone (meaning they won't personally vandalize your car or steal it). (Probably). They only charge about 50 cents US for as long as you want to leave your car there, but seriously people, IT'S THE $#(%!#@&*^@! STREET!!! I can't wait to see my first parking meter. I'll bet there's a bum who sticks you with a surcharge for using the meter. It's his street, after all.

Tonight and tomorrow should be totally sweet. It's Mexico's Independence Day; Sept. 16 for all you stupid gringos who think anyone outside of the US actually celebrates Cinco de Mayo (they don't). Anyway, they don't mess around down here. We were sitting around the house yesterday watching TV, and I swear it sounded like a car exploding in the apartment across the hall, or maybe a cannon being shot off. A big-ass howitzer, not some wimpy small-bore cannon, but real field artillery, strike-the-fear-of-God-in-their-hearts stuff.

This wasn't someone shooting the next Die Hard film in our living room, but rather someone playing with what they like to call "fireworks" down here. I like to call it three pounds of C4. And this was like many MANY blocks away. Can't wait until everybody and their unsupervised four year old kid start shooting these off en masse tonight and tomorrow. Good times!

Don't get me wrong; I'm having a total blast so far. It's refreshing living in an actual city for a change (unlike say Raleigh). The food has been awesome, and if it weren't for battling some nasty bronchitis we would have been paralyzed with too many choices of awesome things to do over the weekend. Next week should be great: Friday we leave for our first road trip! Can't wait. Until then...

A Chicago Gringo in Mexico